Mr Reasonable
Completely Unreasonable
In the event that a couple decide to become parents, there will come a time when they are asked if they would like to know the sex of the child that will be born.
Some parents say yes and they will be told by a medical professional, probably in a hospital, probably just with the parents or a close friend or family member present. Some will say no, waiting for the birth to find out. In these situations, there is rarely screeching and cheering from dozens of people who feel obliged to pretend that they care if they're having a boy or a girl. Clearly a missed opportunity.
Some will take the superior route and gather roughly 50-200 of their closest friends and stand in front of them before a balloon is burst and they are showered with confetti of a blue or pink hue. At that moment the couple will embrace and the 50-200 of their closest friends will clap and say "congratulations, you're having a boy" or "congratulations, it's a girl."
Personally, I'm not so bothered, but I don't know anyone who has had a gender reveal party so I don't know if it's a great day out. Sounds a bit rubbish to me, but eh, whatever.
In what I think might be looked down upon is the way that some people, who some might say are suffering from main character syndrome, or of having general delusions of grandeur, have upped the ante. Now you'll see videos of people screaming in ecstacy
"OH GOD YOU HAVIN A BABY BOY!!!!" "WAAAAAUGH! A BABY PRINCESS!!!!"
"IT'S GONNA BE A BABY"
As a couple reveal their joy, fireworks are set off causing a wildfire, celebrating new life by bringing a firefighter's life to an end:
www.theguardian.com
A beautiful moment.
Others prefer water to fire and will celebrate by polluting a water supply:
www.ndtv.com
Others prefer to abandon land and take to the skies, triggering an event that leads to the death of a pilot who is crop dusting your ecstatic shrieking friends with glitter:
https://m.youtube.com/shorts/JRixLr5-ex4
(Bonus points to the cameraman for not bothering to check in on the plane crash and just filming the couple continuing to embrace for the 'gram).
I'm not sure what people are planning to up the ante with the next batch of gender reveals. But you can bet it'll be worth it.
I personally think that gender reveal parties are bigger than the deaths, poisonings and fires that have been caused and congratulate everyone who has put a bit of effort into making the world that their child will inherit a bit worse. Imagine a school show and tell where a child has to say that no firefighters died or no towns were poisoned at their gender reveal. It'll be heartbreaking. Parents, get thinking now! There's less than 9 months to get this arranged!
So, for parents who are absolutely certain that the only thing that matters is them, I have a few suggestions:
Perhaps some sort of explosion that leads to a volcanic eruption - wil the blue town or pink town be destroyed by lava?
A meal consisting of the last of an endangered species being served - it's insides dyed the appropriate hue.
Perhaps a partnership with Russia who could fill some of their missiles with paint and cover a city in Ukraine in blue. Was your announcement reported on the news worldwide? I don't think so!
So, to all those planning a gender reveal, I salute you. To those, reading this, what do you think? The greatest expression of joy at new life or the greatest indicator that these people should never have been allowed to become parents?
Some parents say yes and they will be told by a medical professional, probably in a hospital, probably just with the parents or a close friend or family member present. Some will say no, waiting for the birth to find out. In these situations, there is rarely screeching and cheering from dozens of people who feel obliged to pretend that they care if they're having a boy or a girl. Clearly a missed opportunity.
Some will take the superior route and gather roughly 50-200 of their closest friends and stand in front of them before a balloon is burst and they are showered with confetti of a blue or pink hue. At that moment the couple will embrace and the 50-200 of their closest friends will clap and say "congratulations, you're having a boy" or "congratulations, it's a girl."
Personally, I'm not so bothered, but I don't know anyone who has had a gender reveal party so I don't know if it's a great day out. Sounds a bit rubbish to me, but eh, whatever.
In what I think might be looked down upon is the way that some people, who some might say are suffering from main character syndrome, or of having general delusions of grandeur, have upped the ante. Now you'll see videos of people screaming in ecstacy
"OH GOD YOU HAVIN A BABY BOY!!!!" "WAAAAAUGH! A BABY PRINCESS!!!!"
"IT'S GONNA BE A BABY"
As a couple reveal their joy, fireworks are set off causing a wildfire, celebrating new life by bringing a firefighter's life to an end:
California couple whose gender-reveal party sparked a wildfire charged with 30 crimes
The pyrotechnic device sparked the destructive El Dorado fire, which destroyed five homes and killed one firefighter
www.theguardian.com
A beautiful moment.
Others prefer water to fire and will celebrate by polluting a water supply:
Couple In Brazil Investigated After Turning Waterfall Blue In Gender Reveal Stunt
A couple in Brazil is being investigated by the environmental ministry after reportedly contaminating a waterfall and river with blue dye in a gender reveal stunt.
www.ndtv.com
Others prefer to abandon land and take to the skies, triggering an event that leads to the death of a pilot who is crop dusting your ecstatic shrieking friends with glitter:
https://m.youtube.com/shorts/JRixLr5-ex4
(Bonus points to the cameraman for not bothering to check in on the plane crash and just filming the couple continuing to embrace for the 'gram).
I'm not sure what people are planning to up the ante with the next batch of gender reveals. But you can bet it'll be worth it.
I personally think that gender reveal parties are bigger than the deaths, poisonings and fires that have been caused and congratulate everyone who has put a bit of effort into making the world that their child will inherit a bit worse. Imagine a school show and tell where a child has to say that no firefighters died or no towns were poisoned at their gender reveal. It'll be heartbreaking. Parents, get thinking now! There's less than 9 months to get this arranged!
So, for parents who are absolutely certain that the only thing that matters is them, I have a few suggestions:
Perhaps some sort of explosion that leads to a volcanic eruption - wil the blue town or pink town be destroyed by lava?
A meal consisting of the last of an endangered species being served - it's insides dyed the appropriate hue.
Perhaps a partnership with Russia who could fill some of their missiles with paint and cover a city in Ukraine in blue. Was your announcement reported on the news worldwide? I don't think so!
So, to all those planning a gender reveal, I salute you. To those, reading this, what do you think? The greatest expression of joy at new life or the greatest indicator that these people should never have been allowed to become parents?
